Aggressively Chill

Dear J—

In an observation that undoubtedly says more about me than them, I’d like to point out what I remember of San Diego drivers – namely that they won’t move to let you in, and after not doing so, will stare fixedly ahead as you drive by, as if to say “look at how relaxed I’m being about this.” I know, paranoia and all that, right? If I remember that weird feeling of incompetence when compared to my peers in so many different arenas in college – from music to physical activities – I also remember how aggressively I worked to try to cover those up, but that didn’t seem to work out so great all the time, either.

If it comes easy, given talent, that’s something that doesn’t need to be overenvied, does it? I’m slowly accepting that in my life, and moving forward with it; I’m forty plus now and it’s about time I grew up.



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