Anger is a corrosive sort of thing and I’m starting to realize the truth behind cliches. I’m not sure if you’ve heard this one – that being angry is like holding a coal in your bare hands to give to someone else.
I end up yelling at the kids at least once a day, it seems: there’s always something else to be outraged about or angry over or, you know, because. You know what? Kids are frutsrtating and you’ll get angry, but it’s your emotions and reactions that are under your control, not your kids’. And in the end there’s not a lot of utility that comes from yelling, other than watching them trying to walk on eggshells around you because every little thing becomes a trigger.
You know how nobody spanks their kids nowadays because they’ve shown it does nothing? In the future I’m convinced they aren’t going to have yelling during arguments; there’s no basis for thinking that it was effective. It’s corrosive and it poisons your relationships; it builds and encourages resentment and we’re done with it. Now I just need to find a way to come back into balance and control.