Letting Fly

Dear J-

Well, today I get to present how we’re going to grow our business segment by 20% over the coming year, which is a whole bunch of words strung together that I never thought I would have to address. Plus I used ‘grow’ as an infinitive. Barf.

I dunno. It just feels like if that’s what I should have been doing all along, then maybe I could have handled things a lot differently than I had, or have been doing. You know what I mean. There’s been a lot of distraction lately but I can’t think that what I do isn’t immediately visible in many ways. Wait, does that even make any sense? What I mean by that is … what? I suppose that if you think you’re in need of salesmen, then I’m probably not your first choice but that’s why I picked this job: it gives me a chance to stretch myself and be uncomfortable in many ways. That’s gotta be worth it, right?

If I dissect the project I last worked on, which was the report update, there are several lessons I need to take from that. Don’t be afraid of cribbing liberally from prior analyses. If the goal is an update, then an update is all they get, right? There are many other things that you could be seeing if you take care of what’s simple instead of trying to reinvent the wheel over and over and over again (I think I ended up running the same or a similar analysis at least five times, iterating until I got an answer that I ended up throwing away later anyway. I suppose I’d declare success if I could be plugged in or out without any fuss. Fungible asset, you.

I dunno if it’s a question of being more or less outspoken as we get along, trying to work through this anger. On the one hand I have to learn control — over myself, over the fact that I can’t control everything around me; these little irritants are going to aggravate me, from the people riding without bike tags to the ones blocking access through the aisle. Yeah, it’s dump and sure, why would they change if they don’t want to? But on the other hand would I feel better if I actually spoke up and challenged them? I think I’d just be displacing my anger onto them, but on the other hand you can’t let these things build up but on your third hand you don’t want to be that etiquette police guy. So yeah, it’s better to learn to let it go, isn’t it?


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