Eureka Coast

Dear J-

If the question is where do I have so much time to do all these other things then perhaps the answer is I don’t. There are quite literally only a few hours in the evenings between getting home (5) and bed (10 if I’m lucky) so where do you chop those up? We try to usher the kids towards bed at 8, dinner takes maybe an hour out of that, and the nightly preparations and ablutions are … yup. Friends who are parents would chuckle and tell me you’ll never realize where the time went when you were childless and I understand that gallows humor now. Time to kill has become time to spend, and hopefully spend wisely enough that I don’t waste it all, even though …

I suppose you could see the way that was going. I also understand the luxuries that allow me to have some time: there is a fixed amount of work and someone needs to do it; if we work together we can get it done faster, right? Work faster and smarter. Otherwise we’re both stuck with too much to handle alone; no one likes to be left pulling everything along. We have every option to explore; I will not be defeated by schedules or time or getting to check items off a list; there’s far too many experiences in the world for that.

You do your best of course. You try to be considerate and carve out enough time for yourself but really, isn’t this what it’s about? Spend some time together before it’s too late and that’s not what they want any more; I understand I’m prickly and standoffish at times and that’s not what they need to learn. Try this on for size instead, then: find a way to make the world more interactive; show them the wonder to be had in the everyday and they’ll never be bored, will they? Constant blinding enthusiasm isn’t always my style but maybe I can learn to deal with it, right?


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