Lost Feed

Dear J-

I had multiple failures of patience last night and I suspect today’s not going to be much better. The train home is likely to be super-crowded, traffic will be bad, and quite honestly none of that should matter because I’m a mature adult, or at least play one in real life. It’s not okay when you’re getting mad over every last little thing and what outlet can you have instead to make it less frenetic at home? I may bemoan the loss of time to myself but isn’t that what you sign up for when you have a family? Get over yourself and make sure what you do is just. No one wants to be around someone with a hair-trigger, but some don’t have any choice, so why torture them unnecessarily?

Just because I can doesn’t make much of a reason, does it? So if I can distance myself from it this morning, I can start doing it in the heat of the moment. One of the lessons from The Explosive Child (which should also be required reading for parents of normal kids) is that children will do good if they can; there’s not, in general, a desire to be unnecessarily malicious. This can be extended to other aspects of your life: that person who cut you off in traffic (wow, what loaded phrasing: cut you off) or the person jumping ahead in line or putting their feet up on the seat … if you treat the world more rationally instead of in paranoid manner then things become calmer, don’t they?

Keep that in mind tonight. If you’re in a rush it’s because you haven’t thought through your schedule. Don’t be so quick to blame others. Is this something you can control? If patience is a knife in the heart then learn when those painful signals mean you’re doing it right. We have a thousand ways to be honest with ourselves and strangers, and if we can’t extend that same courtesy to our families then perhaps we are already lost. It does help to enumerate the blessings in your life, once at night, when you get on the train, when you arrive at work, when you get ready for lunch, whenever you think it’s appropriate. Family. Opportunities. Location. Abilities. Health. Time. Service.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: