I took off work early yesterday and tried to do some at home, but ended up asleep on the couch before too long, waking up occasionally to check my watch and go back to sleep. 9:30 … 10:00 … 11:30 … Time moves in great chunks, hours slip by and no one realizes how much or how far or how little we actually are able to control it. I’m not sure why no one ever says things are as inevitable as gravity and time, but perhaps they’re … well, not disbelievers in physics so much as social cynics. Yesterday was also my — our — anniversary and so now we’ve been married for fourteen years, half of that with at least one kid. I’m not entirely sure why it took so long (one more year of school for theVet plus six years of work?) but that first seven years spanned a graduation, two moves, and buying our first home.
The second seven has seen two births, two moves, and selling and buying a house. I think the second half wins, excitement-wise; I also think the next chunk of time roaring forward sounds pretty exciting too. I have no idea what will happen, only that I’m looking forward to it and all it may entail. Dutiful or not, I’m thrilled to think of the excitement that may lay in store for us. I like to repeat the story that when I first started driving my car in 2000, I regularly got change back from a $20 after filling the tank, whereas now I’d be lucky to walk away having spent less than $50 per fillup. On the other hand I don’t have to deal with traffic or commuting on a regular basis, and thinking about how we dealt with our old plant commute gives me the willies.
Time time time, right? See what’s become of me. You spring this on yourself: it’s all just time, let’s kill some time, stop wasting time, time to go, We talk about time as an impersonal thing, an obstacle to overcome and to lay waste to once you’ve gotten enough momentum going, but on the other hand there’s no time like the present, let’s get this stuff done and on our way over there, why don’t we instead figure out the best way to be … permanent? Famous? Remembered? Look upon my works, ye mighty. This is part of it, writing down what you remember and what you want to remember and what you want to be remembered.