Dear J-

The very mechanical act of writing — pull out the keyboard, let it pair with the phone, begin — is a balm in the morning, although if I was honest I’d be saying that reading a book might be a better use of my time and yours. I get the chance to handle some of the bikes on the train in order to get mine on — or off — and I’m amazed by how light some of them are and the care (or not) some people put into them. There are some minor maintenance activities I could certainly perform by myself — keeping the chain clean and happily oiled, right? — and yet I’m lazy and choose not to, which goes against one of the tenets I’ve been hoping to adopt for the new life here: don’t be lazy, don’t be lazy, don’t be lazy.

When the boy gets up and no one seems to want to take him back, or change his diaper, or walk over to the library: don’t be lazy, let’s just do it, let’s go. Whatever you’ve chosen to do instead that seems so important (often it’s just me running more cars in Pocket Trains) you can do something else instead. Don’t be lazy. Pick up that trash instead of leaving it there. Is this how you’d behave with your mother around? There’s a lot of self-reflection and vowing going on in these morning sessions and yet still very little improvement and execution happening following this bout of self-realization and resolution. Not very helpful, is it?

In the end I suppose I have to find some motivation to change and vow that it’s enough to ensure the change; wanting is noble but it doesn’t make things happen, at least not permanently. To keep a job? To prove what I can do? To keep getting rid of stuff and things I don’t use? We have a lot to fuss with and fuss about, and maybe it’s easier to be overwhelmed and not know where to start, but impossible tasks can be broken down, bit by bit, step by step into simpler chunks. Get something done every day and I guarantee you’ll be happier for it. What’s today’s goal? Let’s go do something.



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