Assume the Best

Dear J-

As part of my continuous fight against anger I’m initating a new creative initiative based partly on the Harry Potter incantation Riddikulus and somewhat on the whole assume ass-u-me thing. If someone cuts you off in traffic, what’s the first thing you tend to assume? Yep, what a selfish bastard, thinking only of their own time and not the inconvenience to you. So you end up retaliating or driving more aggressvely than you might otherwise, trying to keep the gap in front filled before someone jumps in or otherwise makes your life miserable. So you think. Yet with this technique I hope to add entertainment to combat the frustration. We’ll see how it goes.

This is how I envision it: instead of assuming nefarious motives, think of something so utterly ridiculous you can’t help but laugh. They passed me by driving on the shoulder? Well, you know, it is the last day for that big sale on accordions and concertinas and, after all, the store closes in ten minutes. If I was in the market that’s one sale I wouldn’t want to miss. Much like the spider in rollerskates, being able to laugh means that you’re already halfway over it. You will be hassled as you drive: I guarantee it at some point or another. If you take it as personally as you shouldn’t then you’re going to have a huge headache coming home.

It’s more fun this way and you get to exercise your creative muscles too, which as far as I’m concerned is a win all around. We’re not doing this to be mean to the other people who likely are never going to hear the stories we make up. I remember seeing a neighbor screech to a stop at their house and hopping out, pizza in hand, dashing inside. I turned to theVet and said, “AH! Pizza Emergency,” and nodded knowingly. To this day we can’t see folks driving fast and wondering if they too have a cooling ppizza to bring home.



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